Righteous Anger?
This is my fifth post on Pursued, a book by Jud Wilhite.
A few weekends ago, I was enjoying some much needed girl time* when the topic of dating came up (as it frequently does among us single folk). We began with our general collective complaints about how horribly awkward and confusing the dating process is, and then narrowed our focus onto the specifics of one of the fabulous women in attendance that night.
Problem is: she has no clue what a great catch she is. This became more and more apparent the longer we talked.
At first, I took it as standard compliment avoidance. We've all been there; where we attempt to deflect the compliments (and therefore the attention) away from ourselves and onto another person. (i.e. Compliment received: "Your hair looks great today!" Your response: "Please, if only I could get it to look half as nice as yours!")**
Very quickly, however, I recognized that all this negative self-talk indicated deeper issues of identity and self-worth.
I'm ashamed to admit that rather than approaching her comments (and my subsequent realization) with grace or compassion, I became angry.
And I snapped.
I was reflecting on this harsh reaction to my friend's pain, and I realized it stemmed from my tremendous love for her. It broke my heart to see her speaking so poorly about herself, especially when it is so very obvious to me (and about a zillion other people) how wonderful, beautiful, talented, creative, and stunning she truly is.
I couldn't just sit there and listen to her speak all these lies without wanting to defend the truth and stand up for this precious woman who was berating herself.
While I probably could have handled the entire situation far better than I did, I learned a little bit about righteous anger in this process. I can't help but wonder if this is how God feels every time we doubt our true identity in Him, or refuse to see ourselves as valued or worthy of love, grace, or redemption.
Jud talks about understanding our new identity in Christ in Pursued.
Ladies (and gentlemen, too, I suppose): Please don't let the pressures of society, or even the concept of Christian humility, cause you to question your worth or trick you into self-deprecation. Stop seeking the approval of others to define you and start focusing on the only opinion that truly matters: God's.
And can I tell you a little secret? He already adores you.
Just as you are. (Isaiah 43:2)
*I know I've said this before, but if you do not have a few close friends with whom you can trust with your heart, please make it a priority. Today. We were made for community. We weren't created to do this alone. And as always, you can contact me if you just need someone to chat with.
**I'm super guilty of this one
A few weekends ago, I was enjoying some much needed girl time* when the topic of dating came up (as it frequently does among us single folk). We began with our general collective complaints about how horribly awkward and confusing the dating process is, and then narrowed our focus onto the specifics of one of the fabulous women in attendance that night.
Problem is: she has no clue what a great catch she is. This became more and more apparent the longer we talked.
At first, I took it as standard compliment avoidance. We've all been there; where we attempt to deflect the compliments (and therefore the attention) away from ourselves and onto another person. (i.e. Compliment received: "Your hair looks great today!" Your response: "Please, if only I could get it to look half as nice as yours!")**
Very quickly, however, I recognized that all this negative self-talk indicated deeper issues of identity and self-worth.
I'm ashamed to admit that rather than approaching her comments (and my subsequent realization) with grace or compassion, I became angry.
And I snapped.
I was reflecting on this harsh reaction to my friend's pain, and I realized it stemmed from my tremendous love for her. It broke my heart to see her speaking so poorly about herself, especially when it is so very obvious to me (and about a zillion other people) how wonderful, beautiful, talented, creative, and stunning she truly is.
I couldn't just sit there and listen to her speak all these lies without wanting to defend the truth and stand up for this precious woman who was berating herself.
While I probably could have handled the entire situation far better than I did, I learned a little bit about righteous anger in this process. I can't help but wonder if this is how God feels every time we doubt our true identity in Him, or refuse to see ourselves as valued or worthy of love, grace, or redemption.
Jud talks about understanding our new identity in Christ in Pursued.
And can I tell you a little secret? He already adores you.
*I know I've said this before, but if you do not have a few close friends with whom you can trust with your heart, please make it a priority. Today. We were made for community. We weren't created to do this alone. And as always, you can contact me if you just need someone to chat with.
**I'm super guilty of this one
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