The Birth of Lucy, Part 3: Active Labor

11:00am

Justin leapt out of bed and immediately sprung into action, helping me into the shower where I welcomed the comfort the hot water brought as I bounced on the yoga ball. I was relaying instructions for setting up the birthing tub when my next contraction began and I instinctively stood up. We both heard the undeniable "pop" as my water broke. I laughed in relief - what a perfect space for this to happen! - and then urged Justin to call Mirra (our midwife).

She instructed him over the phone to use her doppler and check on Lucy's heart rate, and then said she would plan to come over in an hour. I realized we needed to conserve every drop of hot water to fill the (ahem, still deflated) birthing tub, so I reluctantly got out of the shower and Justin helped me down the stairs. He set me up with a heating pad and the yoga ball and made me some toast (which I promptly threw up, of course), and then began frantically dashing back and forth from the guest room to the living room as he attempted to set up the birthing tub while also offering me counter-pressure for each contraction ALL BY HIMSELF. I knew he needed help. This pace was not sustainable, and I selfishly wanted him by my side without interruption.

12:15pm - ish (approximations are the best I can do at this point, because I was in ACTIVE LABOR)

I texted an update to our family asking for prayer and miraculously shortly after, our front door opened and in walked Mirra and her apprentice, like sweet glorious birthing angels. They immediately set to work, pumping up the birthing tub and taking over counter-pressure duties. My contractions were intensifying and for some reason we moved into the kitchen. Blessedly Justin was able to return to my side.

My best friend Kaitlynn was originally slated to capture our birth, but she was busy photographing a wedding that day (note aforementioned inconvenience of Lucy’s chosen arrival date). Thankfully our midwives grabbed our cell phones throughout the next few hours and documented our journey into parenthood. I love these images because they show how in sync Justin was with my contractions. He was completely with me.

With each new surge, I asked (begged!) to get into the tub. It felt like it was taking forever to fill and I was so desperate to be in water! When it was finally ready, I was told I just had to urinate first before I could get in the tub. So, the only thing standing between me and the sweet sweet promise of hot water was my own dang bladder. Simple enough. I waddled into the bathroom...and promptly forgot how to pee. My brain was so consumed with the intensity of labor, I literally could not figure it out. And even though the bathroom door was wide open, I was alone as everyone else was busy with birth prep.

I felt another contraction starting and instinctively stood up. Our secondary midwife, Brandee, arrived at just this moment and found me, standing there above the toilet, panicked and desperate for relief. BIRTH IS SO HUMBLING, Y'ALL. Using her midwife magic, she somehow circumvented my panic and reminded me how to void, and I was finally given the green light to enter the birthing tub.

2:00pm - ish

Good Lord in Heaven! I immediately felt so comforted by the deep warmth enveloping my achy body. Still, I endured only a few contractions in the tub by myself before I decided it wasn't enough to have him reaching over the tub to support me; I needed by birth partner in it with me. Justin raced upstairs in between my next surges to change into his swim suit. I remember hearing him use the bathroom and yelling for him to HURRY because my next contraction was coming fast.  We learned in our birthing class about the diminished language abilities women experience during labor, and this was so completely true for me. It felt like all my brain was capable of was demanding things like “hurry” and "push! Push! PUSH!" (I was simply a glutton for counter-pressure).

I still felt compelled to make my body as vertical as possible for each contraction but thanks to the padding of the inflated birthing tub, I was able to rise onto my knees instead of standing. I would then collapse back against Justin once the pressure subsided.

Mirra frequently checked in on Lucy using her doppler, and - though she never requested it of me - I tried so hard to be compliant and remain in a reclined position that made it easy for her to access my belly, but once the pressure began intensifying I simply said, "nope" and pushed myself upright again.

Having the freedom to listen to my body and move into the positions it told me to be in was the single greatest blessing of my home birth. I was completely unhindered the entire time.