I Remember

Today is the National Day of Remembrance for pregnancy and infant loss.

I discovered this by happenstance while reading my friend's wife's blog. They are currently expecting their first little miracle. She posted a link to this blog: http://audreycaroline.blogspot.com/ along with her own thoughtful reflections on the ever-increasing number of comments, as women share their own stories of loss.

Initially, I wanted to forward the blog to my sister. Then, I hesitated. Why? Why would I want to remind her of this horrible loss? Why, when she is trying so hard to heal and be patient and trust in God's ever-righteous plan? Why do that? So I didn't.

But she found it on her own. And in doing so, she taught me a lesson:

Miscarriages, still births, SIDS - these aren't just tragedies that happen to other people. They happen to us. Yes, I've never personally felt the heart-wrenching loss of a child. I've yet to come to that place in my life where I even want a child of my own. And yet, I've felt the excitement that comes from a new "bun in the oven." I've eagerly awaited the arrival of my new niece or nephew. I've dreamed of meeting them for the first time, of showing them the world, of being the "cool aunt" that always had gum in her purse. And I've also felt the gut-wrenching pain of realization that, with that child, those things will never come to be.

No one should ever have to suffer through that kind of pain alone. No one. By sharing her story, my sister has insured that each of her readers has a partner through their pregnancy struggles. I KNOW she has inspired other women with her strength, her grace, and her faith. And I also know that other women can inspire her as well.

My cheeks are salty and my eyes blurred with tears as I fumble through this blog. What do you say? What can you say? I try my hardest to relate, but I can't.

Never in my life have I ever shown so much strength. Never have I ever acted with so much grace. And never have I demonstrated my faith so actively.

Read some of these women's stories. I am amazed at their ability to keep trying. To persevere. To trust that the Lord will bless them with babies on THIS side of Heaven (as my sister so perfectly coins it).

“Grief is different for a follower of Christ. Even in the depths of sorrow, hope breaths. Hope that you will see your loved one again in heaven. Hope in God’s capacity to infuse suffering with purpose. And hope that because of his healing power, your sorrow will not go on forever.”


Kendra said…
With salty cheeks and blurry vision I reply.
Thank you, so very much, for your words of encouragement... Although I feel I am not worthy of them. One of the great things about blogging is I can control what I let people see in me. I don't blog about the doubts and fears I have, or just what a mess of a person I really am!
That being said, I meant every word I wrote, especially in my comment on my own blog... I am so truly grateful at the healing our Heavenly Father has granted David and I. We have peace. I would be a fool to think that this is because of something I alone have done. No, it is a gift poured out by God's grace, and by His answering the prayers of SO many who love us- who have cried out on our behalf...like you =-).
I love you little sister.
Vanessa's Dad said…
I'm undone... again... by the compassion and Christ's Love reflected in your transparent blog text, and Kendra's equally transparent comment.

Once I sat with a widow in a hotel lobby - she was a stranger to me. I had complimented her on her wedding ring. She teared up and said her hubby had passed away 23 years ago and she missed talking about him. So she and I sat after I'd finished my shift we had a cup of tea and I listened as she talked and remembered. I think she found healing in the fact that I acknowledged her loss and wanted to hear about it.