Chicken Walk

SCENE: An exceptionally bright moonlit night. A handsome young man and an awkwardly dressed young woman take a stroll in the crisp end-of-summer/beginning-of-fall air. Jason Mraz-ish guitar music plays in the background (this is the sountrack to the young woman's life, of course, and is actually inaudible to anyone but her). It is a very sweet scene indeed.

MAN: (mildly adoringly) Oh you and your chicken walk...

The sound of records screeching interrupts previous Jason Mraz-ish guitar music, as this was certainly not what she thought the young man would say.

WOMAN: Excuse me, my WHAT?"

MAN: Your walk... it's kind of like a chicken.

WOMAN: How do you figure? (secretly panicking because, unbeknownst to the young man, she had JUST had a conversation with her roommate not two weeks prior that went something like this: "I kind of think I walk funny, and, like, everyone KNOWS I do it, so no one actually says anything to me about it.")

MAN: I don't know, there's just something... chickenish about your walk.

WOMAN: Chickenish? Really? What, do I bob my head or something? (laughs nervously)

MAN: No, it's just... I dunno... I guess you kind of bend your knees a lot or something. Either that or you do the Drunken Old Man Walk.

WOMAN: The WHAT?!?!

MAN: Oh come on, you know you do that one. (demonstrates a lazy stroll that does, indeed, resemble something a drunken old man might do) You just don't do it allll the time.

WOMAN: I honestly have no idea what you are talking about, but it's funny you would mention it because this is actually something I feel quite self-concious about (admittedly trying to make the young man feel guilty for picking on her)

MAN: Don't feel self-concious! I think the chicken walk is cute!

WOMAN: And the Drunken Old Man walk?

MAN: mmm.... not as cute.

This conversation of course led to several days of extremely scientific surveying of family and friends, and it turns out that while the young man is the only one who has any idea what this Chicken Walk business is about, EVERYONE knows about the Drunken Old Man Walk. My suspicions about having a funny walk that everyone-knows-about-but-no-one-says-anything were confirmed.
Maybe that's why I didn't win the pageant.... ;)